the control

There it is once again that sweet bubbly, warm, cozy, feeling, that make your insides tickle and made your lips curve for an involuntarily smile… once in the past, those feeling have brought a disaster upon my own heart.. Before this,  the one that I took in was poison in its true form.. The one that I kept for too long it become rotten because I was cut off from the source.. Never to be able to reconnect because he chose the unbearable for me..my little heart was poisoned inside out..

But that was in the past.. Good thing that it healed in time.. Healed to its original form.. But then also to its original freedom and sense.. That worries me a little because then it'll also be able to 'feel that' again.. The sweet feeling at first.. Its addicting.. Thats what worries me.. I can control my actions but still this heart that was healed completely, has its freedom once again restored, for it to feel freely, strongly, boldly and fearfully.. 

I kept telling my heart that you have to be on your guard on what you will feel, what you will see, and I'm glad that it listens to me still.. The feeling that made a fantasy into a game of fake reality.. It’s a good feeling to have (its like so for your dreams) but still you must be brave to control it.. Whatever the situations are be brave and take the best solution that applies the least future damages…

Wonderfully and fearfully made

Psalm 139:14-16

I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

Wonderful are your works;

my soul knows it very well.

My frame was not hidden from you,

when I was being made in secret,

intricately woven in the depths of the earth.

Your eyes saw my unformed substance;

in your book were written, every one of them,

the days that were formed for me,

...1 year has passed since I've shared something.. my heart was cuperating and growing stronger through that period.. my point of view on common things changed a lot and I'm blessed for the new things that I've learned so far.. I know there are much more that I will encounter and experienced.. so I look forward for it.. you've done great little heart.. you've grown stronger and amazingly beautiful.. i'm proud of you.. (^_^)